Saturday, June 27, 2009

I love bunnies but hate you

I love bunnies anything at all that has to do with bunnies, real one's, movies, artwork all that stuff

but you know what..... I hate you, I don't want to... I really don't but I can feel it... boiling up inside of me..... I thought I was going to be okay and I was just going to do this on my own.... but I can't I really can't.... I'm tired of being alone and i'm tired of your lies. I'm tired of people starring at me like I'm the freak here but your the one hiding . Your the one running !!!!! I'm the one that feels this pain I"m the one that still feels bad when all I want to do is hurt you !!!! I want to hurt you like you hurt me!!! I want you to feel what i'm feeling !!!! I want this to stop...

Why could you not have been truthful.. why could you not have been just fuck off heather in the beginning? I wish this could be a movie like a Lifetime special like there will be a hour of a struggle and you would come back with open arms and I would be forgiven and we would be great friends. Why is that so much to ask?

I want my life back!!!! I want to have my mind and my feelings back, bad things can't keep happening to me, you honestly cared for me you said it. ... Now I just want to destroy you!!!!! You hurt me..... You will never know never understand what you did to me. You met my child, you heard my secrets my fears and I heard yours. Why can't you realize , People arn't suppose to treat others like this. I've been threw this... I want a happy ending please I want it. I"m not asking for you to be in a relationship or marriage I want your friendship. i thought it was something special. I thought we had something special.....

Why are these always my lessons, what about yours.... Don't treat people like this... how can you live with yourself ? How ? how can you get up and look at yourself in the mirror? hOw can you live your life and know that a child will be born that's part of you and you are doing nothing but hurting someone.

Then how can People at the my bar be on your side and tell you that i"m a whore. That i'm looking for a father for my childern. that You should ask for a test to make sure it's yours.....or that i'm faking it. You lied, stolen drugs, and things.... you messed with my head and your ex's head but your soooo nice and everyone loves you!!!

You were cruel and hateful towards me , you told me I had no body, that noone thought good things on. I had no friends that were true..... You WON !!!! is it that good enough.... you won and made me feel horiable . You told me you weren't that guy... you weren't that person that you were always going to be there.... why did you have to lie....

Fuck me I was so honest and you just gave me shit.... I felt it we were to be good friends.... Why do I ruin it why do I destroy everything


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